When you’re in a serious relationship, it should go without saying that you’re supposed to involve your partner in big decisions.
Especially when it comes to selling the house you’ve both been living in.
For one person, it apparently did need saying, because they’ve landed in some pretty hot water with their wife after doing just that.
Taking to Reddit, they explained: ‘My wife and I have been married for many years, but before we got married, I had built up a substantial wealth. When we got married, I opted for a prenuptial agreement and complete separation of assets. She also had a significant pre-marital wealth.
‘Besides the house we currently live in, I still own a beautiful apartment in the same city that I usually rent out, but it’s currently vacant.
‘Over the past two years, we’ve had many discussions about moving to a smaller town and getting a house near the beach. Two months ago, we bought the house for our upcoming move. We’ve already made the renovations we wanted, bought furniture, and will be moving into the new house soon.’
So far, so normal.
The poster went on: ‘Since we won’t be living in this city anymore, I didn’t see a reason to keep the house we currently live in and sold it without notifying my wife. Considering it’s solely my asset, I didn’t see the need to inform her in advance. Plus, selling and buying property is always a stressful process.
‘On the day I finalised the sale, I told her that I had sold the house, and she was furious with me for not letting her know. She mentioned that she still needs a residence in this city and intends to come here frequently. I explained to her that I still have the apartment, which we can use whenever we need to be in the city, so there shouldn’t be an issue.’
But that didn’t exactly smooth everything over.
‘She remains upset with me,’ the poster goes on, ‘claiming that I didn’t treat her like a wife by not involving her in such an important decision.
‘On the other hand, I believe I didn’t leave her without an address in the city, and the house was always exclusively my asset, just as she has her own wealth. She argues that it’s a completely different situation because it’s the house we’ve been living in, and we’re moving in the next few days.’
The people in the comments were overwhelmingly on the wife’s side over her spouse.
One person wrote: ‘It does seem that you didn’t care what she thought about selling the place. You should’ve involved her, even if you think it is “your asset.”‘
‘This is your wife,’ wrote another, ‘whom you live with and presumably have for years, and you basically just pulled the rug out from under her.’
Someone else commented: ‘Cool it’s your money, but damn is she your partner or what?
‘If you can’t talk through life decisions with your life partner and treat her like an equal why did you get married?’
Later, the poster added an edit that reads: ‘I’m impressed that there are over 3,000 responses. Just to clarify a few things: We have about 45 days to move out of the house, and we already had our move to the new house scheduled for the upcoming days.
‘I thought she agreed to sell, as we both agreed that the house was too big and required a lot of maintenance. So selling it was always the next step.’
Indeed, having a good level of communication is vital if you want your relationship to work.
Mig Bennett, relationship counsellor at Therapy Finders previously told us: ‘The biggest reason for marriage breakdown, which trumps all in my experience, is not listening to each other, not feeling heard by the other, and therefore the connection they once had is frayed to the point of permanent rupture.
‘One of my favourite suggestions is that you can either be right, or you can be in a relationship.’
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