DEAR DEDIRE: WHEN I realised my fiancé had booked a Christmas holiday abroad, I got really excited. But now I’ve learned it’s only for him, his daughter and granddaughter.
When I saw the payment on our bank statement, I thought he meant to surprise me – but he said I’m not included.
For more advice from Dear Deidre
No issue is too small, too large or too embarrassing. Read our personal replies here.
- Dear Deidre on Mental Health
- Dear Deidre on Identity
- Dear Deidre on Debt and Money
- Dear Deidre on Work
- Dear Deidre on Health and Wellbeing
- Dear Deidre on Addiction
I work in retail and can’t get time off at this busy time of year, but he could have at least asked me to try.
I am 44 and he is 47. We have been together for six years. His daughter is 25 and a single mum to a girl of five.
Get in touch with Deidre
Every problem gets a personal reply, usually within 24 hours weekdays.
Send an email to [email protected]
You can also send a private message on the DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page.
At the very least, I would have appreciated a discussion before he booked it.
Now I’ll be coming back to an empty home from Christmas Eve right through to New Year’s Eve.
I am really upset but my fiancé has no remorse and thinks I am over-reacting.
Most read in Dear Deidre
Mia is spending her first Christmas with new lover Charlie
My girlfriend wants me to watch her have sex with her best mate
I regret sleeping with my lodger – I don't want him in my home
I am genuinely concerned for my son as his half-brother is aggressive
DEIDRE SAYS:At the very least, he was inconsiderate. But perhaps he knew how you would react so decided not to discuss it with you first.
Maybe he is being selfish arranging the trip without considering your views, but he may also have thought this was a Christmas treat for his daughter and his grandchild.
Ask him to discuss commitments like this with you first in the future and show him the benefits of communicating by remaining calm but firm.
Suggest you both talk about ways you can enjoy some downtime together on his return and perhaps plan your own trip together.
NEXT IN TODAY'S DEAR DEIDRE I text my ex every Christmas eve – why am I so obsessed with her?
READ DEIDRE'S PHOTO CASEBOOK Mia is spending her first Christmas with new lover Charlie
GET IN TOUCH How the page works and how to contact us
Source: Read Full Article