{"id":67148,"date":"2023-09-14T00:45:00","date_gmt":"2023-09-14T00:45:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/rapidcelnews.com\/?p=67148"},"modified":"2023-09-14T00:45:00","modified_gmt":"2023-09-14T00:45:00","slug":"stacey-duguid-almost-50-and-im-finally-having-mind-blowing-sex","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/rapidcelnews.com\/lifestyle\/stacey-duguid-almost-50-and-im-finally-having-mind-blowing-sex\/","title":{"rendered":"Stacey Duguid: Almost 50 and I&apos;m finally having mind-blowing sex"},"content":{"rendered":"<h1>HRT is like Viagra for women\u2026On the eve of my 50th, I&#8217;m finally having mind-blowing sex: STACEY DUGUID lifts the lid on the menopausal last flush of lust &#8211; and how hormone replacement therapy (and a French toyboy!) have turbo-charged her love life<\/h1>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>Stacey Duguid reveals how HRT unlocked her imagination, desire and inhibitions<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>READ MORE:\u00a0\u00a0Am I too old for HRT, and is it true that testosterone could give me back my va va voom?<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Buying back-to-school essentials last week, the shops were crowded like a train during rush-hour.<\/p>\n<p>A long list in hand, our No 1 priority, according to my 12-year-old, was to buy an iPhone\u00a0screen protector.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>We found one, and as the assistant laboriously polished the glass of my son&#8217;s phone, from the corner of my left eye I spotted the shop I didn&#8217;t know I needed.<\/p>\n<p>&#8216;I&#8217;m just going in there,&#8217; I gestured toward Ann Summers as though I were off to buy a pint of milk.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>&#8216;For a joke present,&#8217; I continued, pointing in vaguely the right direction, and managing to walk in three circles before I was propelled through the door like a woman possessed.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter\" src=\"https:\/\/i.dailymail.co.uk\/1s\/2023\/09\/13\/23\/75404833-12514705-image-a-9_1694643152035.jpg\" height=\"461\" width=\"634\"><\/p>\n<p>New lease of life: Stacey Duguid has revealed how hormone replacement therapy has unlocked her imagination, desire and inhibitions\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>I must have looked frazzled and confused, and no bloody wonder \u2014 zero orgasms and a long summer can do that to a 49-year-old single mum of two.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>Yet within the garish, low-lit interior of Ann Summers, I knew I would find what I needed.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>I settled on a Womanizer (the type of sex toy I firmly believe should be prescribed on the\u00a0NHS).<\/p>\n<p>The truth is that, in the past few years I have often felt a similar, disorienting compulsion \u2014 a pulse of sexual energy that hits me at the most random of times and feels, frankly, untameable.<\/p>\n<p>It is, of course, quite unexpected behaviour in a middle-aged mum. But no, I am not hooked on the female version of Viagra, although sometimes feel like it.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>Instead, my libido skyrocketed thanks to the hormonal surge associated with the perimenopause \u2014 and has steadily grown even more combustible thanks to HRT.<\/p>\n<p>I had felt my mood begin to lower as my 40s rolled on, so I began treatment at the age of 46.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>I had no other symptoms or hot flushes, but I had witnessed my mother&#8217;s hellish menopause and assumed all that was to come thundering down the track at me.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter\" src=\"https:\/\/i.dailymail.co.uk\/1s\/2023\/09\/13\/23\/75404819-12514705-image-a-11_1694643271173.jpg\" height=\"893\" width=\"634\"><\/p>\n<p>Stacey says her libido went through the roof due to the hormonal surge associated with the perimenopause. The hormone replacement treatment EstroGel increased it even further (Stock Image)<\/p>\n<p>So I went to the doctor as soon as I could for the HRT elixir. At last, I felt calmer \u2014 but my sex drive, which had been on an incline anyway, increased even more.<\/p>\n<p>Not to put too fine a point on it, my clitoris became a veritable alarm bell, sounding loudly at every opportunity and most often when a random, half-decent-looking passer-by caught my attention. Awkward in the queue at Sainsbury&#8217;s.<\/p>\n<p>I had no idea that fake hormones could have this effect on some women.\u00a0That my daily dose of oestrogen \u2014 a single pump of EstroGel on each thigh \u2014 would result in a rabid sexual awakening of the kind I&#8217;d never experienced before. (And if you&#8217;re one of those women who knew, how come you kept that nugget of info to yourself?)<\/p>\n<p>There are many listed side-effects on packages containing HRT but, as far as I&#8217;m concerned, the one they forgot to mention was: &#8216;High chance of making you feel so sexy you&#8217;ll want to sleep with the postman.&#8217;<\/p>\n<p>It is honestly the best-kept secret of midlife womanhood, as though we&#8217;ve all stumbled on a female Viagra by accident.<\/p>\n<p>I had been living away from the family home for six months when I began taking HRT, and in some ways it was a balm, allowing me to express myself sexually amid the terrible pain of my separation.<\/p>\n<p>Like most girls who grew up in the 1980s, I spent my teens and 20s resolutely believing in &#8216;The One&#8217;.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>My safe harbour, keeper of secrets, saviour and all-round prince, this was the man who would sweep me off my feet and then stay with me for life.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter\" src=\"https:\/\/i.dailymail.co.uk\/1s\/2023\/09\/13\/23\/75404827-12514705-image-a-12_1694643285989.jpg\" height=\"445\" width=\"634\"><\/p>\n<p>Stacey admits that she was drawn to the website Toyboy Warehouse because she had reached a point in her life where she wanted sex without any long-winded build-up (Stock Image)<\/p>\n<p>When it came to The One and sex, I couldn&#8217;t care less if it was good, bad or frankly indifferent \u2014 I just wanted the fairy tale I&#8217;d inhaled as a child to come true.<\/p>\n<p>Now, however, whether it was The One or simply the one for tonight, I was ready to find someone.<\/p>\n<p>It was how I found myself alone in a rented house one night, separated from my husband for just over a year and on my weekend without the children, logging on to a website called Toyboy Warehouse. A ridiculous name for a ridiculous site, I thought, even as I clicked on it.<\/p>\n<p>Sure, I told myself, this will make for some funny banter with girlfriends later, especially when paired with wine. Yet secretly, I was intrigued for other reasons.<\/p>\n<p>I was single and fancied a date or two, but why, really, would I log on to Toyboy Warehouse when there&#8217;s Hinge, Tinder and a plethora of other dating sites out there packed with more appropriate, like-minded men?\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>The truth is that I didn&#8217;t want to meet another life partner. I wanted sex without the boring build-up.<\/p>\n<p>Was this what it felt like to be a hot-blooded young man, I wondered?\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>For a couple of days, I ogled profiles of &#8216;cubs looking for cougars&#8217; and realised with a shudder that I was now classed as a potential &#8216;sugar momma&#8217; in the online dating vernacular.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter\" src=\"https:\/\/i.dailymail.co.uk\/1s\/2023\/09\/13\/23\/75404823-12514705-image-a-13_1694643299245.jpg\" height=\"423\" width=\"634\"><\/p>\n<p>She found sex with her new French toyboy, who was 13 years her junior, hot, wild and truly liberating (Stock Image)<\/p>\n<p>The site began to feel a little ominous and dark, and I began to feel grubby for looking at it.<\/p>\n<p>But then, just as I was planning to delete my profile, I happened upon the profile of a Frenchman 13 years younger than me whom I quickly nicknamed Napoleon, despite him being 6 ft 2 in.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>He looked &#8216;normal&#8217; enough, with gorgeous lips, nice clothes, and no axes peeking out from cupboards in the background of his profile images. We arranged to meet.<\/p>\n<p>He came to visit me, and I wasn&#8217;t sure what I wanted to pounce on first, my Deliveroo Lebanese or my tall, gorgeous Frenchman.<\/p>\n<p>Around lunchtime on day two, a glimpse at our naked reflections in the mirror told me all I needed to know. This was fun. It was hot, wild and truly liberating.<\/p>\n<p>Society suggests it&#8217;s practically a crime for women to be up for sex in middle age.<\/p>\n<p>How revolting we must look in bed, compared with young 20-somethings with their perfectly toned physiques.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>But such a view not only consigns half the world&#8217;s population to an arid sexlessness almost as soon as they&#8217;re past 30, but fails to recognise how real women really feel.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter\" src=\"https:\/\/i.dailymail.co.uk\/1s\/2023\/09\/13\/23\/75404829-12514705-image-a-14_1694643313354.jpg\" height=\"423\" width=\"634\"><\/p>\n<p>Stacey explains she has been sexually active since the age of 17 but, playing along and not enjoying it, she didn&#8217;t experience an orgasm until she was 25 (Stock Image)<\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;d rather be the woman I am today, rippling belly from birthing two large babies, upper arms that wobble, and a dimpled bottom that I know Napoleon finds sexy \u2014 all the imperfections that come with midlife, in other words \u2014 than the younger woman I once was who lay there like a sex doll with rigor mortis.<\/p>\n<p>Newsflash: the idea that women mostly go off sex post-40 is a myth.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>Some perimenopausal and menopausal women, even those not on HRT, are experiencing a surge in hormones and confidence that is seeing them enjoy sex much more in their 40s and 50s than they did in their vulnerable 20s.<\/p>\n<p>I swear if this were a male midlife phenomenon, it would be front page news every single day.<\/p>\n<p>Indeed, despite the silver fox images of the earlier James Bond movies, some middle-aged men experience a decrease in libido just as their wives enjoy the opposite. He&#8217;s sloping around in tartan slippers while she&#8217;s raring to go. Oh dear.<\/p>\n<p>Napoleon and I have a committed (and recently monogamous) relationship, and it&#8217;s an unconventional one that works wonders for us.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>We have spent long periods spanning many months apart, and during one of our &#8216;apart&#8217; moments, we both enjoyed sex with other people.<\/p>\n<p>Except, as we both discovered, it wasn&#8217;t as absolutely fabulous as we are together, and so, a little dramatically, we got back together again.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>And yes, you guessed it, the sex on that occasion was better than ever.<\/p>\n<p>Clearly, I haven&#8217;t always been this confident or experimental. Far from it.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter\" src=\"https:\/\/i.dailymail.co.uk\/1s\/2023\/09\/13\/23\/75404831-12514705-image-a-15_1694643327936.jpg\" height=\"357\" width=\"634\"><\/p>\n<p>Stacey started dressing differently, swapping the voluminous dresses of her early 40s for an array of short skirts, and she felt seen again (Stock Image)<\/p>\n<p>Sexually active since the age of 17, I didn&#8217;t experience an orgasm until the age of 25, and that was with a toy, not a man.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>In fact, it was during a series of short relationships in my 20s that I perfected my inert sex doll act, playing along but never feeling or enjoying it myself.<\/p>\n<p>I suspected that great lovemaking was out there, and I hoped against hope it would happen with someone I was in a relationship with, but it never really seemed to. Perhaps, I thought, that too was a myth.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>Ten years after we walked down the aisle and by now 44, I resigned myself to settling into a traditional marriage where motherhood took priority over my passions and desires. I wasn&#8217;t a young bride and yet in some ways I barely knew myself.<\/p>\n<p>Fast forward a few years, and I bumped into an old school friend I hadn&#8217;t seen since the age of 17 outside a pub.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>He asked for my phone number and in the days that followed, despite being married with children himself, the school friend pursued me.<\/p>\n<p>You don&#8217;t need to be a genius to work out what happened next. For a while, we exchanged missives long into the night detailing how unhappy and unloved we felt in our marriages, and then one day, meeting for a drink at The Groucho Club in central London, we had sex.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>The sex was not rocket-launch brilliant, but it wasn&#8217;t about that. It wasn&#8217;t about him either. It was about me feeling desired and sexy.<\/p>\n<p>And I really did feel sexy. At 46, turbo-charged by HRT, I began to dress differently.<\/p>\n<p>With a long career in fashion under my Valentino belt, I know all about the power of clothes, and now I chucked out the voluminous dresses and sensible flat shoes of my early 40s and replaced them with an array of short skirts, 10 denier tights and stiletto heels.<\/p>\n<p>I felt seen again \u2014 by my friends, by men and by myself, and suddenly it felt as though the last hurrah of my ovaries was all I had to live for.<\/p>\n<p>&#8216;There&#8217;s nothing lonelier than feeling alone in a marriage,&#8217; I&#8217;d tell myself to justify the fling \u2014 four weeks of texting and a single night in a hotel.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter\" src=\"https:\/\/i.dailymail.co.uk\/1s\/2023\/09\/13\/23\/75404825-12514705-image-a-16_1694643338750.jpg\" height=\"423\" width=\"634\"><\/p>\n<p>In Pursuit Of Happiness: Mating, Marriage, Motherhood, Money, Mayhem, Stacey makes the point that for years women&#8217;s bodies are dedicated to the duties of motherhood, until the late 40s when that&#8217;s no longer the case (Stock Image)<\/p>\n<p>But it was enough, and, of course, my husband discovered it, filed for divorce, and I really was now utterly alone.<\/p>\n<p>Alone, but still in possession of all this newfound sexuality. Ditching the old school friend but keeping up with the HRT, I started to date.<\/p>\n<p>I met men in nightclubs and hot new restaurants. There were some spectacular howlers \u2014 the rich man I met in a flat with a gold console table and piles of expensive art books who reminded me of the lead character in American Psycho.<\/p>\n<p>The men with the beefcake, fake-tanned bodies, which seem a male requisite nowadays but are so alien to women my age.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>The narrow escape from the man outside a hotel who put his hands around my neck.<\/p>\n<p>The men who spent the entire date talking about their wives. And yet I was amazed to find myself the opposite of self-conscious in those early days of separation.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>Once, on the dance floor at a private members&#8217; club, my eye even caught that of another woman, and tugging her long, blonde Rapunzel plait towards me, I started kissing her there and then.<\/p>\n<p>Emboldened, on another night, I ended up with a gorgeous woman in a black corset in the loos at celebrity hangout Chiltern Firehouse. It felt a long way from polite coffee mornings.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>I even went to a fetish night, only to discover it wasn&#8217;t really my thing.<\/p>\n<p>The truth was, I was, slowly but surely, beginning to find myself. And it wasn&#8217;t about the sex \u2014 though that was an enjoyable pastime.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>No, it was about meeting the woman I truly am \u2014 for the first time.<\/p>\n<p>So now here I am, three years after the end of my marriage. I&#8217;d be lying if I said the pain of divorce does not still linger around the edges of life. It does.<\/p>\n<p>And some may question why I pursued my own happiness to what might have proved the detriment of my family life.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>But in doing so, I&#8217;ve discovered I am now a far more patient and present parent, a better friend and I am more understanding of other people&#8217;s needs.<\/p>\n<p>I am also at last sexually fulfilled. Or at least I am when I&#8217;m with either Napoleon or my latest purchase from Ann Summers.<\/p>\n<p>That post-school drop-off ritual is now well-established. Sunglasses off, car keys down on table, dogs popped into the kitchen, back to bed, explosive orgasm within five minutes, coffee, cigarette and I&#8217;m ready to start the day. (Joking. I don&#8217;t smoke.)<\/p>\n<p>Is it all thanks to HRT? Perhaps not all \u2014 five years of therapy have made a major contribution too \u2014 but the magic of EstroGel certainly plays its part.<\/p>\n<p>For so long, it feels, women&#8217;s bodies are dedicated to the duties of motherhood, and then comes these years in the late 40s when they&#8217;re not.<\/p>\n<p>For me, one year off 50, HRT has unlocked something \u2014 my imagination, my desire, my inhibitions.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>The real reason I&#8217;m finally having the mind-blowing sex I always hoped for? It&#8217;s not the men, not even the lovely Napoleon. It&#8217;s me.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span>In Pursuit Of Happiness: Mating, Marriage, Motherhood, Money, Mayhem by Stacey Duguid (\u00a318.99, Piatkus) is out now.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Source: <a href=\"https:\/\/www.dailymail.co.uk\/femail\/article-12514705\/HRT-like-Viagra-women-eve-50th-Im-finally-having-mind-blowing-sex-STACEY-DUGUID-lifts-lid-menopausal-flush-lust-hormone-replacement-therapy-French-toyboy-turbo-charged-love-life.html\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Read Full Article<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>HRT is like Viagra for women\u2026On the eve of my 50th, I&#8217;m finally having mind-blowing sex: STACEY DUGUID lifts the lid on the menopausal last flush of lust &#8211; and how hormone replacement therapy (and a French toyboy!) have turbo-charged her love life Stacey Duguid reveals how HRT unlocked her imagination, desire and inhibitions READ [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":67147,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v21.8 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Stacey Duguid: Almost 50 and I&amp;apos;m finally having mind-blowing sex - rapidcelnews.com<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/rapidcelnews.com\/lifestyle\/stacey-duguid-almost-50-and-im-finally-having-mind-blowing-sex\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Stacey Duguid: Almost 50 and I&amp;apos;m finally having mind-blowing sex - rapidcelnews.com\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"HRT is like Viagra for women\u2026On the eve of my 50th, I&#8217;m finally having mind-blowing sex: STACEY DUGUID lifts the lid on the menopausal last flush of lust &#8211; 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